Anal play for self-love: Know your asshole

Hi Guys,

Here's a little something-something for your private play...

If you haven't discovered the pleasures of your asshole during self-pleasuring, then now is the time to start. Here's how:

• Your asshole is the yin element to your yang cock. Want to have mind-blowing orgasms without wasting your cum? Get a hand down there too.
• Yin = receptive, feminine aspects of your body and experience. Touch your asshole like you'd touch a woman i.e. take your time, let it warm-up and soften into your presence there.
• Yang  = active, masculine aspects of your body and experience. Yes, think of most porn movies; go, go, go, with a rock solid hard-on. If you've ever given yourself a  'hard and fast wank' you know what this energy is like.
• Soft and gentle, use plenty of lube - coconut oil is a personal favourite. Play around the edges before penetrating slowly. One finger. You can build up to three (!)
• Use your other hand on your cock. Notice how your asshole wants to clench as you reach an ejaculatory climax. Breathe and keep your finger in there. And then go again...no cum just yet. Yum.
• If you have Ejaculatory Choice, notice how your arousal builds in your whole pelvic area, rather than being centred on the bell-end of your cock. If it feels soft and warm, you're there. Breathe and draw it all up into your spine.
• Use your hands to move that energy and around your body. 
• This is a true, personal intimacy with yourself. Notice how your energy shifts and changes. You may laugh, you may cry, you may swear, you may rejoice. You can control your experience and go deeper (literally) as your body softens.
• Breath. Sound. Movement. Stay present. There is no shame here.
• Note: the asshole is such a culturally sensitive and charged area of the body, especially for young, straight men. For some it is the base chakra, which holds our feelings of survival and safety. After experiencing anal 'pleasure' (let's not call it 'work') you might experience bouts of anger or other strong emotions as the experience settles into your body. This will pass. If you are concerned seek specialist help.
• Also note: You may also slip into a profound state of deep relaxation and ease with your body, your environment and your relations with other people. Try it and find out. Love yourself, you are worth it.

Be your best,

D.L.

• PS For more on 'Self-Pleasuring' see my post: Better Thrusting

"Very good news for wankers everywhere..! -
Dr. Deborah Anapol, author The Seven
Natural Laws of Love

Diamond Lotus is a sex-positive erotic explorer, educator, and author. Currently training as a teacher of Pelvic-Heart Integration, Diamond is passionate about promoting healthy models of intimate relating for young, straight men.