How can you tell you're in an erotic trance?

Hi Guys,

Erotic trance is an interesting phenomenon because most of us assume we know what it feels like to be turned on and highly aroused. We are used to the sensations associated with being horny. We might even have gotten a little high during intercourse or self-pleasuring, only to plummet down once our load is shot and our peak is over.

This is not an erotic trance. Simply being horny and getting your rocks off isn’t an erotic trance. It’s like saying you are watching TV when really you’re just flicking through all the channels. Erotic trance is when you are so engrossed in a movie or show that time stands still and all the sensations in your body are heightened. It takes some time for you to come out of it. It’s divine.

So how can you tell that you are in this erotic trance?

Well, simply put, there is a major shift in your focus.
We know that guys are designed to be turned on by visual stimulation – tits, ass, legs, face, eyes, hips, waist, etc. – so we get off on actual or fantasized physical traits and/or interactions. For most of us, that’s as far as it goes. From here we simply build up to a peak, shoot our load and come back down again.

But, if we spend the time building and circulating that juicy, horny, sexual energy by breathing deep, relaxing, moving and touching other parts of our bodies, then eventually that visual stimulation will switch into something else: a feeling focus.

Erotic trance occurs in this feeling state. Here, we stop relying on the external stimulation of others’ body parts, and, instead we become our own point of high erotic charge. Our movements, our touch, our breath, our sensations. Each small point becomes electric with sensual, erotic and ecstatic sensations. Visual imagery and fantasy slips asides into insignificance and we become the wonder of our own depth of feeling. It’s sublime.

There are tools that you can use to master this state: Breath. Sound. Movement.

If you worry this will make your sexual encounters selfish and disconnected from your partner, try being witnessed by them and have feedback on each other’s experiences. You'll be surprised how intimate it is.

If you are a compulsive porn-watcher, try this instead and notice how much the screen (and laziness) has come to dominate you. By the way, if you are ready for a change, gently mastering erotic trance is a superb way to wean yourself off the dopamine-fueled, click-happy beast. I recommend my book, "W@nker!" for this, of course!

Finally, if you find yourself wondering whether you are in an erotic trance or not, you are not. Be patient. Use the tools and keep building charge. Pumping faster or harder is not it; you’ll just cum and wonder what the fuss was about. Breathe deep, explore touch, use oils and lube, allow your mind to wander wherever it does and back again. Wonderful.

Erotic trance is a life-changer.

Be Your Best,

D.L.

"Very good news for wankers everywhere..! -

Dr. Deborah Anapol, author The SevenNatural Laws of Love

Diamond Lotus is a sex-positive erotic explorer, educator, and author. A Pelvic-Heart Integration facilitator, Diamond is passionate about promoting healthy models of intimate relating for young, straight men.